As we have discussed in class, different cultures have different expectations who should be the main caregiver. The article that I would like to discuss with the class was written by the professor of the University of Victoria and the President of Canadian Association on Gerontology and compares the differences in Canadian and Chinese caregiving. According to the article family members are the dominant care system in all societies, providing an estimated 75 per cent of all care.
The article corresponds with what was presented in the class that in Chinese culture husband’s wife is the main caregiver for his parents, while the husband provides the monetary and emotional support. However, according to this article this trend is slowly changing in Chinese society - daughters, even when married, are more and more their own parents’ care providers than it used to be. This change is attributed to the successful implementation of the one-child policy; therefore family caregiving to older adults among Chinese families seems to be getting more similar to caregiving among Canadian families.
There are several key differences between Chinese and Canadian caregiving. Chinese older adults are more likely to live with their children even while they themselves are still married, while it is unlikely for Canadians, who would live with their children only after losing a spouse and getting health problems that impair their independence. Moreover, Chinese children are more likely to begin helping the elders with activities of daily living even before their health warrants it. It is offered as a sign of respect for their parents’ age; while Canadian parents stay independent as long as possible. In addition, Chinese sons tend to be more involved in their parents’ care even when daughters are involved. The article explains it with the historical role of males in Chinese society. Often, not always, health-care decisions are handed to the son and not the older adult themselves because the son is granted the privilege of the decision-making on the behalf of the whole family. However this trend is slowly changing because many families have just one daughter due to the one-child policy.
The article acknowledges the fact that all families are different and it is extremely hard to generalize about a certain ethnic or racial group and their views on caregiving. However the current cultural attitude towards caregiving is slowly changing in the Chinese society due to decreasing fertility rates in certain areas of the country (for example, Hong Kong), and the main concern now is about the societal arrangements that will provide care to the childless elders that has so long been provided by adult children.
Questions for the class:
How would you feel about living with your husband’s elder parents and be the main care provider for them?
What do you think are some changes in American society that might affect the existing caregiving arrangements in the nearest future?
If you have siblings, have you ever discussed with them who would be the care provider for your parents?
Link for the article:
http://www.theprovince.com/life/Essay+Cultural+diversity+caregiving+older+adults/5534561/story.html
I would not like to live with my partner's parents and be the main caregiver for them. I think that it would infringe upon my ability to work and be an individual. I hesitate to want to care for my own parents, so I find it difficult to imagine placing my life on hold in order to care for someone else's parents.
ReplyDeleteSome changes in American society that may influence the existing caregiving arrangements is the aging of the Baby Boomers. Even though we have many long-term care facilities, there may not be enough to house the Baby Boomers.
Another change that may affect the existing caregiving arrangements is the Social Security Crisis. If Social Security funds are depleted and changes are not made to the current system, older adults may not have the financial capabilities to stay in a long-term care facility. This could lead to more older adults living with their children and a shift in caregiving throughout the United States.
I did my Wiki page about different cultures around the world and their views about caregiving; also, because of the one-child rule in China, more and more elders are having to be institutionalized these days. So times are definitely changing.
ReplyDeleteFor me personally, I do not have a problem with the thought of my parents moving back in with me if they need it years down the road. The way I see it, they spent so many years helping me and raising me, I would do anything to do help them stay out of a nursing home. I feel like my husband would probably feel the same way about his own parents, so accordingly I would be supportive of caring for his parents. I haven't talked about it with my siblings, but I think that my three brothers probably feel the same way. As for who specifically would take care of my parents, probably the person who didn't have kids yet would be the best person to help.
I think it would be very difficult to live with a spouse's parents and care for them. In many situations the daughter and mother in law do not get along so I think it would be very difficult for them to live together much less have to be the caregiver for them. Also, I feel that many women would feel threatened that their mother in law would try to com in and take over their house which many people are territorial about.
ReplyDeleteOne thing that is definitely changing in American society is that people are living much longer and the Baby Boomers are all aging which will cause a much greater need for care. Also, ideas about care are changing in many ways with new options available to help individuals stay at home and many people are trying to create reform in nursing homes and assisted livings to transform them and move away from the idea of "places to die" so I think this will have a major impact on care.
Thinking about how changes in American society that will impact caregiving arrangements in the immediate future...
ReplyDeleteI think that with the economic downturn, there may be an increased role that children play in their parents' caregiving. Many retirement accounts have taken a major hit since the 2008 economic decline. This leaves less money for older couples to spend on a retirement homes or other retirement communities. This will leave force many older couples to care for themselves or to seek the help of at-home care. This at-home care could be provided by a thrid party or by their children. So, I think there will be an increased role of the children in the near future in the United States.
But looking more long term, I don't believe that the caregiving scene will change much. I think that retirement homes will continue to be a popular chice among older couples. Caring for older parents doesn't seem as important in American society than in other cultures around the world.
I completely agree with you, Stephanie, our parents did so much for us and sacrificed time, and money and other resources so I would do do anything to keep my mother out of the nursing home. Taking into consideration that I am in the US and my mom is in Russia (where the nursing homes are HORRIBLE) I have no idea how I am going to do that.
ReplyDeleteAs Stephen mention, the economic downturn is definitely playing an important role, and taking into consideration that American nursing homes are expensive, i do believe that more parents would end up living with their children as they age. It would be interesting to see if the caregiving will look any different in the next couple decades when all Baby Boomers retire.
I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years now and he is the primary caregiver for his grandmother. Recently he asked if I would be okay with helping him take care of her. I do not have a problem with this in any way because I worked with the elderly for many years and I feel that this is something that I can do, even if it is not my grandmother. As for my parents, I know that my sister and I will be the caregivers because I know my brother will not be comfortable helping them physically. He would be more involved in their finances and emotional support. We know that we will all have a hand in helping our parents when the time comes and this is something that my parents will never have to worry about.
ReplyDeleteI would not mind living with my husband's parents and caring for them, I believe that is something that people should do for their family. When you get married, you are marrying into a family as well as accepting them into yours. I think that taking care of the elderly is something our society greatly lacks, we need to respect our elders and take care of them when they are in need.
ReplyDeleteThe baby boomer generation is inevitably getting older and the age of the population as a whole is getting older and older due to medical advancements as well. This will increase the amount of elderly that will need assistance and nursing homes may become overcrowded, and home care may become more common.
I do have siblings, but we have not discussed who will take care of our parents. However, being the youngest I will probably take the lead in making sure their needs are taken care of.
How would you feel about living with your husband’s elder parents and be the main care provider for them? I would not be against living with my husbands elder parents if they were in need of a care giver. I would however be less inclined if my own parents were in need--but if my parents were well off or not in the picture I feel as a daughter-in-law it is part of the responsibility to care for the extended family, thus your husbands parents.
ReplyDeleteIf you have siblings, have you ever discussed with them who would be the care provider for your parents?
My brother and i have never had a discussion question about who will be the care provider for my parents, mostly because there has not yet been a need to. My parents are relatively young and lead very active lives. I think because of this, neither my brother nor i see them as needing assistance. In a few years we will have to have this conversation--and then i am not sure what we will decide. I think a lot of this decision is based on who is living where and what our jobs are. Right now, my brother is not working a job that would be very flexible if he needed to be the primary caregiver for my parents, and thus it may fall on my shoulders. That is not to say however that my brother would not do as much as he could when he could. But i really believe it is all situational.
From my point of view Cynthia brings an interesting point that there is a gender difference when it comes to caregiving. The same as he brother would not feel "comfortable helping them physically" it does not mean that he would not help them at all, he might help financially, as well as help them around the house with the chores. While female caregivers are more likely to deal with the physical aspect of caregiving (helping with the bath, clothes changing, feeding). I think it has to do with the certain societal expectations for males and females, but at the same time there are plenty of examples that break the existing stereotypes.
ReplyDeleteDepending on the relationship that I had with my husband’s parents, I would like to think that I would not have a problem being a caregiver for them. However, I feel like it might be a little out of my place to do so (assuming they have other children who could care for them) and therefore might feel odd about doing it. Also, if one of my own parents needed a caregiver at the same time, I would probably choose to care for them (my parents) over my husband’s parents. My sister and I have never discussed who would be the care giver for my parents, but I can safely assume that it would be me, not necessarily because I am the oldest but because I have a more nurturing personality.
ReplyDeleteIf the circumstances arose that my family had to take care of my husband's elderly parents, I would be willing to be a care giver for them. I would try to divide the caregiving up as much as I could between family members because there would be a lot of stress being the main care giver. This would be especially hard if I still had kids at home and now had a parent to take care of as well. I would honestly want to split the care up between multiple family members. Americans are moving away from "home" and family more and more often, meaning that are not living in the same place as their parents are. They may not be able to move their parents to where they are or move back to where their parents live. That means that their may be more parents in nursing homes than before. I have two younger brothers, but we have never discussed who would be the care giver for my Mom. She is still young and my brothers are young enough that my Mom is still doing much of the caregiving for them. I have a feeling the caregiving would fall on me and maybe the older of my two brothers. I'm the oldest and the ring leader of the siblings, so i have a feeling that I would be making most of the caregiving decisions, with input from the boys.
ReplyDeleteDepending on the situation, I would not mind helping with the care of my mother or father-in-laws. However, if my husband wasn't helping I would not be as happy about it. It should be a joined family effort to help care for an elderly parent. It should not be left up to one person. Today's society sends mixed messages about caregiving. There is such an emphasis on the negative aspects of caregiving that I think it deters people to do it. Many people just resort to putting their loved one in a home, especially if they are not living in close proximity to them. My siblings and I have never discussed what we would do if our parents needed help in the future. I think this is a topic that we should probably address sooner rather than later. Many people wait until it is too late to decide what to do and then all of the work is placed on the shoulders of the sibling that is closest in proximity to the parents. I do not want this to happen to my family. I think it is important to give back to our parents that have given us so much. However, I think it should be a group effort.
ReplyDeleteI would not mind taking care of my husbands elderly parents if need be as long as he helped out also and there was appreciation involved. For my own parents, I would not mind one bit taking care of them when they get older since they sacrificed so much in taking care of me and my brother. My brother and I have never discussed who would be the caregiver but I am sure as time goes on it will come up. I think things such as the economy affects caregiving and how much people can afford to pay for caregiving.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how I'd feel about living with and taking care of my spouse's parents. I would feel a lot of pressure by the family to do a good job. I think some changes in American society that will affect the existing caregiving arrangements are cohabitation and the rising of the retirement age. Couples who are cohabiting may not have the financial stability to take care of their older parents. The retirement age is on the rise. The older the population is, the more health concerns. This could affect a person's want to become a caregiver.
ReplyDeleteWhat do you think are some changes in American society that might affect the existing caregiving arrangements in the nearest future?
If you have siblings, have you ever discussed with them who would be the care provider for your parents?
I would not mind being the care giver for my husband's parents. Part of marriage is becoming one family so it is important to be there for them at times of need. I would expect my husband to be supportive and help out with day to day tasks in order to alleviate stress. I think nursing homes are going to become more and more popular. Many people do not have time to devote their full attention to one person. I have not discussed care giving arrangements with my siblings, but it is something I must do soon in order to be better prepared to care for my parents.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I've always felt as if I'd do a great job of taking care of elderly parents since I really enjoy spending time with older adults. I sort of look forward to the day when I'm needed for support and help, so it wouldn't bother me at all to take on that caregiver role. Besides me saying all that, however, I do realize that the role is probably a lot more difficult than I'm imagining and therefore I hope I still feel this way when I'm presented with the situation. I'd like to believe that I'll still see the opportunity as a bonding experience for my wife and I, but you never really can tell if it's going to work out that way.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to my sister and I, we've never actually talked about who would be the caregiver for our parents but I definitely believe we should. As of right now, it makes sense that it would be her role since she's older but still lives with them, and my family's pretty aware of the fact that I plan on traveling for a good deal of my life. In the future, however, it might become my role since I'm more of a caregiver personality than she is!
I do not think that I would have a problem with helping care for my husband's elderly parents. Although it would depend on what type of care they needed. If it was something that my husband and I were not capable of taking care of then I would want a professional to come in because I would want them to receive the best care possible. Obviously this would be something that my husband and I needed to talk about since they are his parents.
ReplyDeleteMy siblings and I have never discussed who would take care of my parents when they become elderly. My family situation is slightly different because my sisters are 12 and 14 years older than me, and they have families of their own. My brother is 5 years younger than me so I think that if one of us still did not have a family of our own we would probably take care of our parents. However, I think that it would be as equally divided as possible. My oldest sister lives out of town but my other sister lives 15 minutes from my parents, and they help take care of her children so if she was still the one living the closest to them she would probably take over the caregiving for the majority of the time. However, I do not know where I will be living or my brother. I guess its just something we never though of but maybe it would be a good idea since our parents are entering their late 50s.
Lynnette brought an interesting point - to be a caregiver because of the nurturing nature. How about a family where none of the siblings possess a nurturing personality, how should a question of caregiving be decided then? How would you define a nurturing personality?
ReplyDelete